i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
I woke up to somebody tossing my salad... I should have drank more
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
I wonder what dick looks like without astigmatism?
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
Hey how're your balls?
Don't ever let me helicopter again.
Randomize
