well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want him to come over and snuggle with me but put a bag over his head. Is that rude?
It's not rude if you use a pillowcase that's softer.
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
I puked on someone's floor last night and then they proceeded to ask me on a date.
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