Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
I asked if he wanted to come over and he said he was busy. Then I sent him a pic of me in the bath with the bottle of wine I already finished and all of a sudden he was free. Booty calls are too easy.
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
I've been trying to masturbate for the longest time now and so far I've accomplished getting tangled in my computer battery cord and phone charger and hitting my knee on my laptop.
Randomize
