Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
I want to make a zoo with you.
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
Hey can you tell Daniel there's a bottle of Captain Morgan's in the dryer ...
Sorry I think you have the wrong number
Yes it looks like I do
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
This is a friendly reminder to try not to shit on the toilet seat. If our 4 year old can manage it, I think you can too.
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
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