Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
I had to warn the neighbors
Warn them about what?! It's noon
"Pay no attention to me if at random points of the day I'm outside with kitty cat ears on" I'm a mess...
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
I just had a 30-minute convo with an irrelevant fuckboy from college who decided to tell me FOUR years later he’s sorry for sleeping with 3 girls at once including me.
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
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