i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
Looking through last night's sexting, realized one is a haiku..
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
No way in hell. Unless I was drunk Tindering again....my swiping finger gets drunk too I guess
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
Of course the sales lady was judging you, you bought a pregnancy test, ky jelly, diet pills and a 6 pack of red bull. Even i'm judging you.
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
“before I show up tits a blazing, what’s the sexual temperature here?“
I'm just letting you know right now in advance that if I die or go to the hospital or end up in jail tonight it's because your kid sold me mushrooms.
Randomize