Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
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