I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
i just discovered how you can fold down the cardboard sleeve on a hot pocket. Life just got a whole lot easier.
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
Shout out to my liver for being the true MVP. It easily put in more work than LeBron or Curry this week.
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
Got pulled over today for going 90 in a 40 zone with my leg out of the window. Still got out of the ticket. I'm getting way too good at this. Wanna trade bodies so we can see if it's my boobs or my charm?
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
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