They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
I was going through my settings and the phone randomly started playing "Crazy Little Thing Called Love" by Dwight Yoakum. Out loud. At full volume. I was shitting. There were 3 other people in the bathroom. I love iOS 7.
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
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