I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
You're always so late and I'm always so drunk.
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
Randomize
