i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
I ate 1200 calories worth of chocolate covered marshmallows and googled why it is okay to be single forever
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
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