Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
He better not be in your backpack
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
Duck, Duck, Goose is now the autocorrect, safe for work version of fuck, fuck, loose.
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize
