But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
FYI... At my funeral, it will be your job to throw yourself dramatically onto my casket.
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
Holy shit, add "successfully got stoned secretly at a party where a cop was" to my list of accomplishments.
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
...Just this whole adulting thing gets in the way of mermaid drag shows at lesbian bars.
Randomize