Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
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