Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
All she gave me for breakfast was raw toast. How can she expect me to eat raw toast?
You mean bread?
Just chased ups truck with a half wiped ass for you. You're making dinner tonight
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
Im just drunk enough to admit that I miss Hannah Montana.
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