she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We jumped on a random trolley because total strangers offered us free vodka. We're not even on the route map as far as I can tell. I see now how those people died in "Hostel"... we deserve whatever happens to us tonight.
Watching the dude who probably knocked me up be all cute with his girlfriend on my couch. I am too nice, and I hate today.
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
You were so drunk last night you left the bar to go buy a razor so you could go home with him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
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