i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
You sat on a wall pretending to be a gargoyle before shouting "batman!" and jumping at me
I'm the drunk Des Moines deserves, but not the one it needs
okcupid is pretty much insisting i hook up with this chick who looks like andy milonakis.
I feel like you're gonna be reading this at 6 AM in a ditch or under a bridge, but please remember...I offered to drive you home. And you said no.
The sad thing is that it's 6:45 and you're not far off.
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
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