I got chris browned last night
walked into a party last night, i saw 3 ex gfs standing in a circle talking to each other...that's the quickest u-turn i've ever made in my life.
She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
I wish i was in the wii world.
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
Just cuz I'm recovering alcoholic does NOT make me the taxi for you every weekend
Randomize
