Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(917): View more from New York City

I just walked into a tree. I think it's time to go home.

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(480): View more from Arizona

hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?

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(352): View more from Florida

Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.

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(562): View more from California

Dude, a dry wedding reception should nullify the vows, because really, without the booze, you might as well be 5 years old again and playing dress-up

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25 People Didn’t Realize They Were Talking To Someone Famous
Read it at the TFLN blog
(443): View more from Maryland

My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden

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(256): View more from Alabama

You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.

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(758): View more from St. Lucia-Carib

He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.

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(334): View more from Alabama

You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.

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(314): View more from Missouri

He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.

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