the new term for farting is butt boxing.
i wanted to iron the shorts i'm wearing. but i'm high and lazy. so i'm using my hair straightener. in bed.
I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
Randomize
