the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
Have you ever been up at one in the morning and thought to yourself, "I do not know nearly enough about penguin reproduction"?
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
We need to get me chipped asap
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
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