we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
All the alcohol I spilled on myself must have acted as a disinfectant or something. I haven't showered in three days and I still don't have a staph infection from sleeping on the lawn with you.
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
there is nothing more depressing than your birth control alarm going off while you're masturbating, and realizing you've been taking pointless precautions for over a month now.
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
Why did u text me "I want to get drunk and go to pizza hut tomorrow. don't let me forget." at 3am??
That text was pretty fucking self-explanatory, man.
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
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