Oh my god he is having a sentimental moment right now.
He just sent me like a really heartfelt confession of love in which he ended with "make the apt, I'll hold your hand while you get your clit pierced."
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
Do you know anything about the Easter basket sitting on my doorstep filled with porn and peeps?
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
Were at her birthday dinner and her dad keeps buying me shots saying when I was your age I fucked the shit outta girls
Hahahahahaha remind him your dating his daughter
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
Was expecting a sext from Kristi and then my mom randomly sent me a pic of her ugly Xmas sweater. Worst. Buzzkill. Ever.
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
Had to lock my cat in the bathroom so I could masturbate in peace.
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
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