Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
She just tricked me into telling her the balance of my 401k... She's like a gold digging jedi mind trick ninja
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
Randomize
