I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
You said you were going inside to sober up and then you poured yourself a wine glass of warm gin
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
How's my date look?
Like a retarded elf
In a good way
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
Randomize
