STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
i just figured out how to balance my wine bottle on my boobs so that i don't have to tip it with my hands...breathing has new meaning
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
I told the bartender that he could give me back the tip I gave him if he outsmarted me in a battle of wits. He has yet to challenge me.
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
last night I mixed vodka in with my protein shake... and you tell me my new years resolution was impossible
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Randomize
