please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In a bar surrounded by couples hooking up. I'm just staring at one. Not drunk enough. Come save me.
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
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