Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
Do you still have your period?
It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat.
just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
His glasses broke on the way to the bar aNd he ended up talking to this butterface all night. I didn't have the heart to tell him
Apparently I was pointing at birds and yelling "YOU USED TO BE A DINOSAUR!!!"
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
Had mirculous sex while watching miracle. Until she got mad that I kept quoting the movie. Not my fault I'm a good multi-tasker
Do you believe in miracles?
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
Randomize