Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
I made her a sippy cup with eggnog and whiskey. My meditation app told me to go the extra mile for someone today, so I did.
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
Now I have to set an alarm for less than 6 hours from now to wake her up, get her showered and get her to her first day of tutoring a kid from her church. WTF is my life?
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
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