Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
You made out with two different species that night
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
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