Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
So we walked by this chick's house and she starts yelling at her boyfriend "STOP HITTING ME WITH YOUR DICK"
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I love my roommate; her alcohol problem, her proclivity for passing out on the living room couch, and her fucking awesome size d tits that can never remain clothed. Craigslist jackpot.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
I was woken up at 6 am by a second grader trying to give me a sweatshirt for a pillow
Never go with a hippy to a second location. I fucking hate Xanax.
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
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