all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
Turns out, his fucking is as lame and staggered as his NFL career.
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
Dude, if that was the MLB player I think it was leaving your bedroom this morning please tell me you got his autograph. It could pay the rent for like six months.
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
Randomize
