i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
In my defense, last night's hookup turned out to be my actual girlfriend. That's gotta count for something, right?
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
I mean, as I was vomiting in front of a giant crucifix I became acutely aware of my poor choices
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
Randomize