awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
I just had to pull over at a starbucks to throw up in the bathroom. They really should not have let me be a lawyer.
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
I know we had a good night last night because his turtle was half asleep chewing on the used condom.
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
There are two types of people in this world I don't trust: people who collect stamps, and people who don't drink
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
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