yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
I thought he was gonna sex me but then he ran to my bathroom and jerked off
i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
That's why there are breakfast margaritas.
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
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