Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
Favorite thing said to me in 2012: It's like you have two tongues!
Were you keeping a list?
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i woke up to you and that girl going out onto the balcony naked
oh sorry man.. we went outside because we DIDN'T want to wake you
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
I told the cops they couldn't arrest me until they found my shoe. Now I have the grant county cops looking for my heels by the rail road tracks.
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
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