tell your sister to shave her snatch
so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
There are two guys dressed like Spartans from 300 at this bar and they're making out and I needed you to know this
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.