seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
You tied the party balloons to your nipple ring so that everyone would know you partied.
So this text is costing me two dollars because I'm out of the country, but I just wanted to let you know it went well with the stripper last night
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
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