Where were you when I was single???
Still in diapers.
I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This just in: I met a girl who does the phone sex phone lines, and shes' 5'4" 320. I'll never get a hardon again through a phone.
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
My Sexting was not on an AP level
If Dr Phil has taught me anything about myself, it’s that I can seriously relate to those women who fake their pregnancies.
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
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