If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
My entire life is one complicated drinking game
Just woke to a Christmas wrapped pack of hotdogs in my bathtub. How high did we get?
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
I created another version of Halloween, it's called swalloween, whatever girl in a slutty costume you bring home has to swallow or forever be known as the holiday grinch
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
Wake up. Eat bread. Find your dignity. Don't be late for work again.
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
They offered me pot brownies in 7 minutes flat. Imagine my horror when I had to be like, are those gluten free?
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