wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
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you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
Woke up the day after the party with a bruise on my stomach. Pretty sure my liver was trying to escape for fear of it's life.
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
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