Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
Xanax and allergy medicine look a lot alike when you spill them on the floor. Just saying that I still have allergies but I'm unsure if I still have legs
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
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