people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
trying to imitate man vs food after 12 shots doesnt mean youll get laid
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
Dad just asked me to breathalyze grandma
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
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