he had to chose between the booze and condoms
what did he choose?
the booze, then looked at me and said, plan b is free right?
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
AHHHHHHHHH. I LEFT A GLASS NEXT TO ME WHEN I FELL ASLEEP I'M SO SURE IT WAS WATER BUT NOW IT'S VODKA JESUS MADE A STOP
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
I thought he was foreign, but it turns out when you're that drunk, an Ohio accent just sounds Russian.
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
Randomize