If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
Text me later if you aren't dead and wanna have a drink later
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
Randomize
