i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
So I just saw a commercial for tickle me Elmo furry gloves. And I thought hmm I bet I could jerk off with those. Is that a sign of deepseated charachter issues?
Don't worry about later. I already pre-ordered a pizza for a 1:45 delivery and told them to ignore any calls from your number.
You're getting good at this, you know that?
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
Randomize
