Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
Randomize