Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
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