Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
i'd fuck the guy who invented dead baby jokes.
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
She forced me to throw up so it would "rejuvenate" me. It worked and then we took six more shots and did a keg stand. You know what I call that? Friendship.
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
your mom just called me and asked me why i'm not in jail with you right now.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
I'm going to tell you something and I want no judgement because it's america day and I'm wearing an American flag bathing suit but...I woke up in a yard.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Randomize
