We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
You know you have hit the best years of your life when you enlist the 5 year old to be ball boy during beer pong and pay him with candy you stole from Walgreens
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
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